Sep
30
Good morning. Your hair looks weird.
Anyway.
If you’re reading this in the morning, rest easy knowing that I am on a plane. A plane to the Big Apple with my Gs. If it’s later in the day, we’re probably eating. There’s going to be a lot of eating – just looking at the itinerary will make you gain 5 pounds. The sightseeing is determined by the food locations (walk thru Central Park to get to cream puffs). But anyway, we’re going to NYC.
2.5 weeks ago we casually said we should go, and then we made it happen. (It may have been fueled by impending re locations if we’re being honest here.) We scrimped and borrowed and begged flier miles and hotel points and even tried to kick someone’s cousin out of their Brooklyn apartment. We may have had meetings. We may have sent approximately 73 emails regarding where to eat and what to wear. I may have created a pin board about it. But anyway, we’re going to NYC.
I am in total anxiety driven frenzy regarding my wardrobe, my shoes, and an irrational fear that I will run into Bill Cunningham wearing white tennis shoes. It’s awesome. I may need pills.
Um, so, I thought it would be fun for you to come with – I created an account with TripColor to do a live blog (via my iphone) of where we roam and what we do and what we see (and you can judge the final wardrobe decisions). You have to login.
*times up, I’ve taken down login info
[edited by MB: Once logged into TripColor using the above credentials, click on the large B&W photo to access the entire trip]
I have received permission from my traveling companions to document this trip. I did not receive permission for the image above which I found via a google image search. I am lazy and bad and that is not my picture. But anyway, we’re going to NYC!
Sep
29
I’ll be the first to tell you I have issues. I like to think my neuroses are quirky little endearing traits. They are. Which is why I’m showing you this picture.
Behold: The Bake Sale Box
You know that stupid color that I can’t stop using, but doesn’t work anywhere? I feel bad for the color, I really do. While I was finishing up the turquoise tide, I decided to paint a cardboard box for my bake sale donations. Yes. I painted a box for a bake sale. A box that would be thrown away. All because I knew that paint would match my Ikea napkin.
I would also like to offer you this tip (for free): don’t bake and paint at the same time. They are really not good companions. Plus, it really makes your house smell weird.
Sep
28
The mirrors in my bathroom are Fancy, and I’m not exactly a Fancy girl. They are so Not Me. I told MB I could live with them for a bit, but would probably replace them with something less….. ornate. But I never did. I just got used to the Liberace vibe. 
And my bathroom (like most of the house) is decidedly NEUTRAL. The people that sold the house were flipping it – so it lacks a certain personal vibe. I’m working on that issue.
These are the befores. Capiche? [click to continue…]
Sep
27
It’s kind of hard not to make pinning a full time job – there are just so many cool things out there. Of course there are now people that have started groups to actually do/make/eat/wear the stuff they pin.
I’m not part of any of those groups. (I’m so rogue, so maverick in my cliche – ness.)
But I have been working on using my boards – and not just baking. Hopefully I’ll pull the loose ends together in a few rooms of my house and I can show you that stuff. Meanwhile, I thought you might like to see my pinterest inspired activities. No? Well then back to FB for you.
So let me start with an image that I’ve been obsessing over:
I don’t have a piano, but I remembered something that has been bugging me ever since we moved into our house. So I started painting and learned that paint just begets more paint. And then I had to repaint, because apparently I’m not good at choosing colors. Painting has been my life for several weeks now.
But right now, I’ve got to go to Costco and I’ve got to go outside to find out why the contractor from next door is so obsessed with my chickens. I am going to quickly type up a “NOT your dinner sign.”
These are the glamorous days of my life. GLAMOROUS, I tell you.
Sep
26
I think it’s really important that kids feel like they can talk to their parents. Parents should listen, really listen, work with their kids, and show a vested interest.
And now for some hard core, indisputable, thoroughly researched, FACTS:
3% of what kids say is adorable, quotable, and entertaining.
97% is completely inane, obnoxious, and irritating.
I can’t stand listening to my kids. It drives me nuts. I pretend to be an active listener. I use my (very studied) lit up expression that I involuntarily internalized from an Oprah show 9 years ago. I get down on their level, I look them in the eye, and the screaming inside begins. Please let it end soon. Please. Or, Shoot me now! (I think I said that last thing out loud once and Lego Maniac asked me why I was thinking such violent thoughts. I shrugged him off.) I get distracted by their weird permanent teeth, and make mental notes to show them proper brushing techniques. I catch myself doing the staring, but not actually focusing thing, and then they ask me what’s wrong with my eyes. I tell them I’m just relaxing them. [click to continue…]
Sep
23
It’s kind of interesting to see the google searches that bring people to the blog. For a while I was getting a gazillion hits for Rumspringa, thanks to my drunken Amish girls image. At a certain point I felt like I should post an apology to people sincerely seeking information with no interest in learning about my kids’ adventures in grandparentland. Oh well, that’s the internet for you, lots of information – abundant, but not quite accurate. There’s a life lesson there.
Anyway, there are the regular boring searches, but every once in a while stuff pops up that makes me scratch my head, or laugh, or raise my eyebrows. And now a list (because it’s been a while since I’ve made a list) of my favorite google search terms for this blog:
I like to party
Tina Fey’s husband
are Mormans allowed to wear leggings?
why do mormons like anthropologie
am I hot?
Is Paula Deen crazy?
“mom w/blue hair”
hot pants for boys
“piles of clouds”
This is how they show up in my Statpress. I have not corrected for spelling, etc. I have yet to figure out “piles of clouds” but it makes me feel wholesome, so I’ll take it. The big brotherness of it has made me a bit more conscientious about my own search terms. But mostly, I just love how we all treat Google like a Magic 8 ball.
Sep
22
I really should not be allowed to have scissors. I use them mercilessly, and at the weirdest times. Like when I was getting ready for church the other day, and I noticed that the strap was loose on my Free People dress. All it took was one quick thought, oh this is coming off and I could just snip it, and the next thing you know I’m armed. You have to realize that in that moment I was also picturing some to-the-floor dresses I’ve been eying. Add to that the sheer gauzy softness of this dress, and you can see why I had to cut off the straps (and 4 mini belt loops) to create my super maxi skirt.
I couldn’t find any pictures of the back, but there was a long leather ribbon (ribbon? thong? belt?) that crisscrossed up then tied; I wound it up and used it as a necklace. My weirdness runeth over. I didn’t have time to make it a for real skirt in 5 minutes, so I just cinched it up with my belt. I’m going to get some elastic and make a real waist band in the near future. [click to continue…]
Sep
20
No, I never tire of the egg puns. It’s MB’s fault that I even enjoy puns, but we’ll talk about that another day.
All of our hens are laying now and they seem to be going strong at one per hen, every day. 4 eggs a day accumulates quickly, so we’ve begun to distribute to neighbors and friends. I love how they come in all different shades, shapes, and sizes.
I tried to line them up from smallest to largest, because I don’t have more important or interesting things to do. That one on the far end is like a XXL. I ate it on Saturday and it had 2 yolks – a twofer! That’s actually the second time we’ve had a double yolk egg. Must be all of those PBJ crusts.
My backyard is a total wreck 1) because we have been super negligent with weeding and 2) the hens have pretty much killed the grass. But I think I’d take our little experiment over yard of the month. I don’t really think of it as farming, but the other day when I was out in the rain and mud with my wellies on, hauling a bucket of water and tidying up the compost pile, I had that this is my land and these are my animals feeling. Which is probably why I found myself talking to chickens in the rain.
Then I went inside to the internets to find a fab pair of fall boots. Cause that’s the kind of farmer I am.
Sep
19
Do you know that you can search by images on Google? Incredibly helpful. Especially when you have to (need, will die otherwise) find out just where to buy the jacket you saw on pinterest.
image from Sundaycrossbow.blogspot.com
Like a lot of links there, it doesn’t take you to the original post. I really can’t tell you how much it bugs me that people don’t bother to give proper credit. You always end up at somebody’s tumblr blog of pictures they like and absolutely no idea where they got the image from. But don’t swear yet. Just google it. [click to continue…]
Sep
16
Dinner is less than fun at our house. There is always someone crying, whining, or complaining. Or banished. But family dinner, like our veggies, is good for us so we keep doing it. Every once in a while we will all have a good time. Unpredictable and intermittent rewards are what keep me in this parenting gig.
So last night we were doing our dinner thing. Lego Maniac was particularly chatty (probably because it was “choose it” night and thus there would be no picky eater gagging demo). And then he blurts out,
“I really want to go skydiving!”
MB perks up and leans forward, because this is right up his ally, “Skydiving is so fun, do you think you could really jump out of the plane?” (MB is one of those annoying people that has done just about everything.)
Lego Maniac replies without skipping a beat.
“I want to do it in those tunnel things. You know, the wind tunnel one on the ground…… inside.”
dramatic pause.
“You know, less of the I’m falling to my doom, and more of the wa-hoo I’m safe!”
